Find Love by Tending Love in 3 steps!
This month I want to talk about finding love through tending your garden, and your garden is Love itself. Your garden is a metaphor for life and by tending it we can make it the best it can be.
Also, in this blog let’s talk about the fine line between doing our best to endeavour to live our very best lives, and being gentle on ourselves and simply following our bliss. The shelves in the book stores are completely overflowing with self-help books. Of course, I love this as I most certainly have treated myself like a personal growth project for many years. I am sure you can hear the negative aspect of that in my ‘voice’ when I half joke about how I’ve treated myself. I’m also very proud and positive about the incredible effect that this striving for a better life has had on me.
The other day, I heard someone talking about how all we really need to follow is what we love. Simply doing that can make our lives the best they can be. I completely agree with this because following what with love, tunes us in to our intuition, brings many blessings and lights us up..... This helps us follow the breadcrumbs - which are clues The Universe sends us to help us create more of what we want!
Recently I’ve been talking on the socials about inner work and finding love using an analogy of weeding. You can find an Insta example here: https://www.instagram.com/p/C--Dq-cvkbE/
and a FB example here: https://www.facebook.com/welcomelastinglove/posts/pfbid02BWbEuRCCirJ3KURkpgJasd5QdjkMgBkJYyVurVcYydfzASTAsJ94JuyzF6h2UNGWl
As I weed the bindies in my yard, I’m weeding out the thoughts, beliefs and feelings that no longer serve me. (For my International friends, Bindies are Australian weeds that hurt because of the prickle on them once they mature in summer). I mean literally weeding them out – for example I’m pulling out any feeling of lack, clearing attachments or I am releasing any blocks to love.
Tending the garden of our lives is a metaphor to use in the search for love. Our garden is our life and also Love itself. Tuning into this metaphor is a very good idea because there’s both no such thing as perfection in a garden and also gardens are perfect in their imperfections. (Just like us, and Love!)
Gardens have cycles - the flowers bloom and then they die, the plants need pruning, composting, fertilising, we need rich, fertile soil and we need to get out the pests and weeds. If we use striving as a way to try and reach some fake version of perfect that doesn’t exist, then all of our striving is for nothing. But if our striving is simply tending – weeding, pruning, watering and do on (these are all metaphors) – we are simply trying to make our garden the most beautiful, vibrant, life-giving, abundant and transformative garden, and life as it can possibly be!
Okay let’s take talk about the three steps.
1. Create.
The create stage is really important, it’s where you vision what you want. I know I talk about this often but it’s essential! Without a goalpost how can we aim, let alone reach, the goal?
If I hadn’t created the vision for the home that I currently live in, we would never have even arrived here. It has an office for me, three separate bedrooms, a gorgeous and massive backyard, incredible neighbours that feel like family and a location this close to Noosa beach!
There’s not enough space here to describe all of other examples I have heard of people manifesting exactly what they want by simply having a vision! I have done this in my own personal life and there are many from other people‘s lives that I’ve heard off – so creating your vision is really very valuable in affective!
2. Tending.
In your garden there are so many things you can do to create a gorgeous, abundance and sparkly magic place! (This is like prepping your life for love!) Your plants need pruning, this is when you’ve looked at everything in your schedule and decided what doesn’t fit any more so you take them out to leave room for a dating and eventually, a partner.
The composting part is so good because what no longer serves you, and what has hurt so much in the past can be used to fertilise what you really want, so that you can attract it in your next relationship! Getting older matter – waste -and transforming it into something valuable that will deeply nurture your garden is the goal here. This can be from journals, mementos, thoughts and feelings from previous relationships. It’s very valuable to go through what you did and didn’t like, what you want to keep and what you want to throw away as you start the composting process.
Fertilising is your self-care care. The more fertilised your garden is, the more abundant it will be so there’s lots of surplus love, energy and abundance of joy for yourself and whoever you choose to spend time with. We need rich, fertile soil – when we are nurtured and built up by our own actions, we do not expect others to do that for us!
Finally the weeding – I very much love how weeding can be used figuratively and literally to weed out what no longer serves us. As I weed my actual garden, I always remember that I am pulling out, one by one the things that no longer serve me, leaving room for the grass and beautiful herbs and flowers that I actually want to grow!
An example if this is, as I pull up a weed I will say something like, “Thank you feeling of insecurity that has kept me safe all of this time, I am releasing you now as I step into abundant confidence, joy and freedom!” Try it! I would love to her how you go.
3. Enjoy!
Enjoy what you have created! When your life, and love feels very rich, nurtured and abundant it’s so easy for you to enjoy being in that place and also for a potential partner to step into that space so you can spend time together and work out if you want to get to know them further.
What a wonderful, rich and joyful place to start a relationship from!
I would love to hear how you go with it. Please comment here or email me on shannon@welcomelastinglove.com as I truly love hearing from you and it would be so lovely and fun to keep this conversation going!
Image Gratitude: erda-estremera-0ZxdAGG4aWU-unsplash